If you have seen me in the past few days and I look a little tired -- this might explain it.
As gross as the ingredients already are in mascara -- I still wasn't up to wearing it after it had been used to stir the toilet with. It was a brand new bottle too!
I guess I can see more than a slight resemblance
Anyway if going without mascara isn't what is making me look tired...
then these sketches should explain it...
13 months and he is already hitting the terrible two's!
Climbing, jumping, biting, pulling hair, dumping things everywhere, tearing pages and pinching. Mascara or not - I think I am going to look tired for the next few years.
On the bright side -- researching for this post I did find out that the myth I had believed since I was a teenager about mascara having bat guano in it is false -- It doesn't have bat poop -- only fish scales.
That's much better - right?
I seriously have had this exact same high chair since Natasha was a baby. We got it in Pittsburgh from an add out of the Penny Saver. Tamsyn and Trey used it in Singapore and then it made its way to Washington.
Four babies and I don't know how many meals -- but Dantley is the first to do this!
I cannot turn my back on him when he is in that thing. He thinks it is a stage or something. We have caught him several times up there like he is surfing a killer wave. Instead of putting him in there with a few cheerios to snack on while I make dinner I have to let him roam free underfoot.
He climbs out of the belts in shopping carts too! I am just glad he hasn't figured out how to escape from his car seat quite yet.
Ummm -- yes that is Tamsyn dropping beads on Trey's head. She got Ashley M. to conspire with her and they stayed occupied that way for at least 20 minutes of the primary sacrament program. The beads were tiny and she had gathered them from off of Natasha's dress.
Trey was trying so hard to stay reverent, even amidst being a four year old and being poked on occasion by his neighbor. He never even noticed that he was getting attacked from above too. He held still very well until the last 5 or 10 minutes and then just had to get his wiggles out too. I was trying my best to give Tamsyn "the eye" from the congregation, but for some reason she wouldn't look at me. Luckily there are around 100 kids in our primary so I don't think too many people noticed.
(added later) I forgot to mention that Dantley also managed to get a goose egg on the side of his forehead right before the program started. He bashed his head against the wooden hymnal holder and had an instant bump. Bad enough that the lady sitting next to us sent her husband to get some ice.
GOOD IDEA - Walking to church on a beautiful Sunday morning
BAD IDEA - Wearing shoes that I haven't taken out of the closet for at least 5 years
I guess when you only shop at the "high end" places like I do -- you don't get the kind of quality that can stand the test of time. These shoes started crumbling about a quarter of a mile into our walk and it just kept getting worse with each step. At first I thought that the straps were just going to pop, and then it looked like I had a flat tire-- finally the heal came crumbling off and all we could do was laugh as I crossed the road hobbling to the stake center.
So if you saw me barefoot at stake conference...
Yup - you now understand.
When you were a kid did you ever see those National Geographic World Magazines? If not you definitely missed out.
My sister had a subscription and when she wasn't looking I used to like to thumb through it. My favorite part was the very last page. There was always a grid of abstract angles or super close up pictures of things. The point was to try and guess what they were. I loved it -- thus my inspiration and wordy explanation for today's picture layout.
Can you guess?
The not so beautiful things that happen to moms after having gorgeous little babies --
A - Ultra saggy lumpy bumpy skin and funky stretch marks (not pictured --Deflate, inflate, squirt, drip or hang -- you get the idea, right?)
B- Hair falls out in bunches and grows back eerily similar to how a 4 year old's does when they cut their own bangs
C - Goopy white sticky smelly decorations on my either way too baggy or rubber-banded to button clothes... and just FYI -- right now I DESPISE all of my clothes and my closet too.
D - No, I didn't get mugged on the street, I just haven't slept for longer than a 4 hour stretch for 7 months
So -- the other day I was thinking about all of these amazingly opposite of sexy things that happen to us after giving birth. I couldn't help but wonder -- WHY!? Seriously, we just did one of the most amazing possible things by participating in the wonderful miracle it is to bring a new glorious life into the world! Shouldn't we get to be beautiful and radiant and full of extra energy? I thought to myself, what kind of payback is this for all the work we moms just went through and are about to face?? ... and then with the possibility of sounding slightly irreverent, I thought -- maybe someday if I get to be in charge I might just take these not-so-fun side affects away. I might make women who have just had a baby suddenly look like super models simply because in my opinion (and feeling as hideous as I do right now)... it seems we deserve it. Goodbye stretch marks. Hello nice smooth curves, glowing skin and flowing locks. Sounds nice right?
Then it hit me --- Maybe there is more to it.... Maybe all of these unattractive things are just nature's way of helping us keep these little darlings well spaced apart. Something like natural birth control.
I mean seriously--- if we were hotter than ever after having a baby... well you know. Our bodies must become ugly on purpose just to up the chance of getting a longer break.
Sounds completely logical to me - I guess there are good reasons for everything...
When we first moved to the Pacific Northwest I remember hearing on the radio that more sunglasses were sold per capita in Seattle than any other U.S. city. What!? At the time I thought that a bit strange.... doubted it even.
I get it, I truly do.
Have a very Happy Seattle Sunglasses day! Soak up as much Vitamin D as you can while you can get it without taking a pill.
Recently I have been involved in some weight loss competitions to help me stay motivated to lose the weight that I gained with my pregnancy. The first competition I did with Jake and since then he has been very supportive and interested in my journey.
My kids have also been paying close attention to the whole process -- CLOSER than I realized.
Oh SO funny -- Bet she doesn't realize she just lost the privilege of sharing mom's stash! :)
It all started when we went downstairs to have breakfast and found that our cat had knocked over one of the plants in the night....
What! This plant is poisonous keep it away from small animals!?
Not knowing what else to do we left to walk to school. Both girls were a mess. Tamsyn felt terrible and Tasha was worried her guinea pig was going to die any second because her sister had fed him a toxic plant. Feeling helpless and worried, I called Jake. He calmly offered to call the vet and then called us back just before we arrived at the school.
For my sister and her cute and spunky little 4 year old, Justee Rose.
Totally embarrassed that her mom followed her and caught her asking the neighbors if she could move in she ran and hid her face in mommy's shoulder.
She didn't much want to talk about the subject anymore.... but did come to this conclusion ---
This really happened. It blows my mind that she slept on it and still was determined to go out in search of a new family the next day. All I can say is -- Four year olds are AWESOME! You never know what they might do over a piece of cake.